For the past few weeks of trading, the market took a trashing. I was one of the small boat in that treacherous climate. Luckily I have beefed myself with a rather effective plan, at least it proof effective for last month. And here I am, getting my plan really tested on this volatile 2 weeks. Gain some, lose some but the biggest loss I got, was self confidence and guilt. My cuts are overall good but my profit taking?... that really suck. Toyed around by my own emotions which atlas cause me to deviate from my plans. Day after day, I asked myself why am I not discipline enough in my exits. Even if I lost money but if I had followed consistently on my plan, I should looked forward to a great big tick on my trading diary. Who a, I kidding? Looking forward to a great big tick wasn't enough to keep me discipline. So I came to realize that I may need other forms of motivation. Reward or Punishment? Buy myself a new laptop? nah...I will buy it anyway... Prick my finger with my wife's glucose tester? Am I crazy!!! Then while googling for Self Punishment (pretty psycho to google such thing), I stumbled upon this website by urban monk.
http://www.urbanmonk.net/247/
This is great written article. There's one part that brought me to my senses. Whenever I am in a trading position, my emotions immediately changes. FEAR and the What if? question circles around my head like griffon vultures. And like any average human being, to end that awful feeling, I just get myself out of position by exiting anyhow. Phew.... What a relief!!! Wasn't that good? And guess what the next awful feeling subconsciously filled my body - GUILT!
This vicious cycle repeat everyday. I need a way to end this.
And that is when I realized this beautiful question:-
"Why am I feeling this way?"
Asking myself this simple question immediately let me consciously felt the fear that took over my body subconsciously, bring it out from within to 3 feet away from my body and look at it. With that irritating feeling 3 feet away, my mind becomes much clearer which allow me to objectively plan my exits.
This simple question also help me to check on my other feelings like anger, frustration, sadness that fill me now and then coping with the pressure of life. I am glad I am psycho enough to google for Self Punishment. So aways remember the question from the Buddha within whenever you felt negative.
